A Neverender

I found this when Google Image Searching for Facebook-related lolz.



And I love it.

It's summer you know. I'm doing okay don't worry about me. Everything hinges on remaining employed, but I'm okay with that. I'm in the trenches with the American People maybe.

I'll do an update sometime I mean it.

No, but things are really good. Life didn't used to be this terrifying I don't think but that's how it works maybe. Maybe you hurt people and love people and try to be as good as possible in an overall sense do you know what I mean oh god I hope so.

And you will come back. And this is the best summer ever.

 

Reply to: pers-xbgkk-1219719096@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-06-13, 12:53PM EDT


PostingID: 1219719096

I planted this sod did you plant this sod let me tell you about planting this sod oh for peat's sake.

I went to a bbq in a backyard and it was pretty fun. Joe and some other people invited me. I was getting beer at a bodega near the party, and I looked over and it was Molly who I know via the UP. She said, Oh hey are you going to the bbq? We were the only white shoppers and it's weird watching the world shrink. I forgot about how this happened in college.

There was the nicest dog at the party, and Molly is moving to Hancock in July and told me about her UP aspirations. I am pretty jealous. Some other Michigan people were there and they told me funny stories about what happened when they first got to New York. Everyone has some insane story that happened to them for no reason when they first got here. The dog was really calm and had a bum knee and a deep connection with me.

Everyone is on unemployment and loving it. One guy who lived at the apartment kept talking about the sod that we were standing on that he just planted. He also made a garden and is growing lots of different things in it. I am not that interesting.

I am excited about the summer and taking it easy but taking it. If it doesn't coalesce I'll make it coalesce. I'm still missing everything and all the time and more than ever. Joe told me I'm staying forever that he can feel it, and I said nu-uh I'm moving to Calumet when I'm old. Everybody grinned like they always do when I say that.

I left my card reader in Austin, so you should check out Sarahana's blog until I get another one. We were at a lot of the same stuff.



Look at how hot and sweaty and happy we are. NYC kids. Austin was so sunny and nice. In parking lots listening to indie-pop. Or in dungeon basements listening to garage-pop. Or in terrible dance clubs listening to folk-pop. Everything was duct-taped PA speakers and telephone plans and Tex-Mex portions with poor alcohol pacing. Days would end, and friends would ask me what I did, and I’d freeze up, unable to recall anything at all. It was too much, and made me dizzy and dehydrated, and I loved it.

Everyone’s feet hurt real bad and now I am nostalgic for hurt feet. When you sit down and the blood goes back into your heels, and it’s like they’re frostbitten. And sometimes at Ms. Bea’s there were a thousand kids, but it wasn’t overwhelming for some reason. Everyone was just hanging off the stage or dancing on the patio or drinking in the parking lot or eating BBQ out front. Familiar faces were everywhere. Everything was so casual. Man Austin was good vibes.

Todd P booked really big names at Ms. Bea’s—a tinyyyyy bar with a sizable parking lot, small stage, and no cover—and sometimes you would get up front for bands you liked, or sit on the stage railing with your ankles crossed, or stand elevated on a street light base, arm around the pole, trying to hold your camera still enough; or maybe it is midnight and Casiotone For the Painfully Alone is playing an epic set, and tons of people are moving to his bassy sad-sads, but you are with new and old NYC acquaintances on a small staircase behind the stage, overlooking it all, sipping beers out of paper bags as if you were on a stoop in the city. And maybe that one girl appears with the name you can’t remember, and she procures a staggering amount of weed, and you get stoned and give all the girls on the stairs marginal boy advice.  So you are a stoned sage maybe, and CFTPA is playing Hey Bobby Malone, which means his set is almost over, and you have this awesome idea. You get up and walk downtown towards Marie, before Casiotone is finished. And maybe it is one of the most surreal experiences of your life: walking down the sidewalk while a songwriter’s voice that you’ve loved since you were sixteen carries five blocks through the midnight air, just like you hoped. Goodnight Owen. Thanks for getting really excited when I said hi.

I think I’ll go again next year.

Collin's latest entry was crazy.

You should read this blog.

Magnolia.

but I wish everyone in the world would listen to the This American Life episode, Bad Bank. I got home at 3 and put it on to fall asleep, but I couldn't. It was the most amazing, interesting, and effective communication of information I've ever experienced. Like, if our airwaves were really operating in the best interest of the public, every network would be playing this shit on loop. SO GOOD. AND KINDA SCARY.

The most insane part was at 37 minutes when they have an academic talking about the ratio between GDP and consumer debt. The ratio used to be < 50%, until the 80's when it started to shoot up. It's now at 100%.



NOTICE THE OTHER TIME IT WAS AT 100%.

Crazy. This American Life is life, the rest is just details.

"The problem is us. The problem is not the banks, greedy though they may be, overpaid though they may be. The problem is us... We've been living very high on the hog. Our living standard has been rising dramatically in the last 25 years. And we have been borrowing much of the money to make that prosperity happen." -David Beim, Columbia Prof

See subject.

Not really. We did drink deal breakers though, and the cat continues to defy all logic. Anna called and was really excited about her Valentine's Day date, which made me really excited about life. That good things are happening. I'm not so depressed or anything like that. I'm getting better at dealing with things. I know which songs to play, and all their words.

I am gonna stay up all night and listen to this.

New York City: I want to write you all down. Can you imagine if you could stop everything for a little bit and think about it. The whole city. Like a photograph. And you could know how many people are eating dinner and how many people are taking out the trash and how many people are doing it. I think I’m starting to care a little bit. Oh no.

It just keeps getting bigger, not smaller. That’s what she said. I ran over the Queensboro Bridge and in fifteen minutes I was in Midtown, and people were in their highrises and I could see some of them under yellowed lights in polished furniture. What were they thinking about. I ran and ran. Others were walking around and I wanted to talk to them, perhaps because the only person I talked to in person today was the woman who took my order at the Thai place. Hello everybody! How are you! I’m okay! I live just over the bridge! Yeah this one! It’s all right over there! One time I ran a marathon! Okay see you!

And being on the bridge is so great. The East River feels close but it is not that close. The bridge is huge, I can’t stress this enough. The Roosevelt Island Tramway runs parallel to me, and I run along with one of its cars, and I see the people and wonder if they are a little bit scared, because I would be, and I love them. I really like the Queens-side of the bridge because there is the largest public housing project in the city, and this really great park with a turf pitch that Latino soccer players play on. I hope they let me play with them someday. I’m sorry for not explaining this better. On top of the bridge you can see northern Manhattan really well, and then on the other side of you is really fast cars, and the downtown skyline, and building after building and they are Legos maybe, and you can’t get this one Morrissey song out of your head, and sometimes when you look at Manhattan and try to imagine it all as woods and farmland you can do it, but it is hard sometimes at night for some reason, but whatever this isn’t a test and you have new running shoes and a new haircut and it all works. It’s all working out. Say it again.

Every song is about you when you move to New York City.

I really like stay at home nights. I feel bad, but I go out a lot, and it’s okay right. To stay at home. Today is a stay at home night and I am doing nothing much. I am listening to songs on repeat and thinking about shaving my beard. Freedom is wasted on me.

Tomorrow is Matt Jones and Carol, then the day after again with Joe Scott and Drunken Barn Danc3, and little old me.  I will buy me a beer for myself, for you.

From YiiioiiiY's Flickr.

So I have been here for weeks now. I know how to get to most places in Manhattan unassisted; I can get to Park Slope and most of Williamsburg by myself too. I can read the maps. I know about how the V train doesn't run on weekends, and the 7 train doesn't blast by my window either because of construction. I even get the buses some. There's a lot of stuff I don't know still, but it's all unnecessary for survival, so I don't quite care enough to study it yet.

But there's a lot of pressure to know things here. I guess when everyone comes from such varied backgrounds, there isn't much smalltalk to be had. So your conversations are all centered around street names and neighborhood going-ons and can you believe they're cutting weekend service to this neighborhood or all the condos going up down the street. I just haven't figured out how to care about any of it. I guess that happens once it feels more like home.

Today is the first sunny day in the history of the world. There were skateboarders and I loved them. The workers are hammering on the tracks, making the city better. They know us at the diner. It is so warm. I ordered running shoes, so that will be nice. I'm thinking about doing three months of training, applying for the NYC marathon lottery, and then decide in April if I want to go for it. Y memberships aren't that bad, and there's one in LIC even.

On weekends, Brandon and I drink coffee and play number one summer jams. He paces a lot, sometimes half dressed, and talks about cute girls and life's many possibilities. So I've been sad a little but these things and sunny days make me feel a lot better. The scene leader here might help us blow out a nearby unused space, and then BZ/me can start booking stuff hopefully. We're gonna build something this summer.

Gonna buid something this summer.

We went to this humongous warehouse show in a super empty industrial area. There had to be be 1500 kids there. I can't really get into the garage pop that BZ loves so much—it all feels insincere to me—but this show had tons of punk rock. John Sellers says, "A rock show, if it's any good, should make you feel younger. And if you feel younger, you should act younger." I was a sixteen-year-old on Friday night. The USAISAMONSTER were super volatile and surprisingly technical, encouraging the huge, lurching mass of Brooklynites/Baltimoreans, of which I somehow got vacuumed to the front. In my Coors-Light-fortified-euphoria, I dedicated the entirety of Cocaine Wedding to watching the tattooed drummer. In what was undebateably a recognition of our brotherhood in this epic moment, the drummer did a series of fills that involved pointing a drumstick in my direction once a measure, before slamming his ride cymbals (which he used as crashes! Dude!). Oh man, and people were jumping off of the speakers, and I was all sweaty and—

Later Double Dagger—Baltimore's hardcore punk gem—played, and BZ/Karen yelled at me to go back in the oblivion, so I did despite anxiety that it would feel disappointing after my recent religious experience. I found myself holding hands with the lead singer, screaming a chorus (IF YOU'RE NOT BUILDING A SCENE/YOU'RE BUILDING A GHOST TOWN). Sixteen. I smoked a cigarette and felt really cool.

So anyway things are all right. I hope my job works out, and our venue works out, and my life works out. Someday I wanna live in Calumet with a big porch and a dog and a wife. I really do. But for now this, I guess.

I <3 Depressionz

| THE 1896 | . moved from Danbro .
215 Ingraham St @ Gardner Ave | East Williamsburg / Bushwick, Bklyn
L-Jefferson | 8pm | all ages | ---| $3 |---
| PICS |-- http://www.the1896.com/the1896/Area_-_2.html

all other details remain the same, two stages, bands playing staggerred one after the other, great times, two towns coming together, etc!

pro PA system on both stages, in two beautiful -heated- rooms, both w/ vaulted ceilings and great sightlines!

====| FRIDAY 1/30 @ THE 1896 |==== . moved from Danbro .

:: BKLYN vs B-MORE BATTLE MARATHON!
:: 2 stages, bands from Brooklyn on one, Baltimore on the other
:: ---| $3 |---

NOTE: to accomodate all these sets, we will be starting the first band EARLY @ 8:15pm!!

:: B-MORE
::
:: DAN DEACON
:::: Double Dagger
:::::: Future Islands
:::::::: dj Dog Dick

:: BKLYN
::
:: Woods
:::: Blank Dogs
:::::: These Are Powers
:::::::: USAISAMONSTER

:: PLUS REALLY GREAT SPECIAL SUPRISE GUESTS EARLY ON!!!!

NOTE: to accomodate all these bands, we will be starting the first band EARLY @ 8:15pm!!

| THE 1896 | . moved from Danbro .
215 Ingraham St @ Gardner Ave | East Williamsburg / Bushwick, Bklyn
L-Jefferson | 8pm | all ages | ---| $3 |---
| PICS |-- http://www.the1896.com/the1896/Area_-_2.html

| DAN DEACON |
"Absurdist composer and electronic musician performs with his "messy table of fancy electronic whosit and howsthat." Dan's music strives to take contemporary experimental composition and electronic music out of the circle of the esoteric intellectual gangs and hipster communities and place it into the more informal "fun time." His performance and compositional techniques shows strong influences from the Fluxus Movement, Spiderman, Absurdism, and the current movement in underground rock. While maintaining a constant performance and tour schedule he has spent most of his time working on pieces for brass ensemble, string quartet, solo cello, casio song workings, solo study and his study in mid and high frequency sine waves." - BALTIMORE CITY PAPER . Listen to Dan again, for the first time.
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/dandeacon
| RAD VIDEO |-- http://youtube.com/watch?v=ouE1Y6bK90s

| DOUBLE DAGGER |
"One of the toughest things about being an amazing live band is transferring the in-person experience to CD. And there aren't many better live bands than Baltimore trio Double Dagger... There's simply no way to recreate that infectious live energy, but the aptly-titled Ragged Rubble comes pretty close... This is the kind of record that probably won't make it onto the radar of too many people, but will leave a lasting impression on those who take the time to listen." - WASHINGTON POST . "Double Dagger has always provided dark, frenetic, politically charged punk rock for people who enjoy using their brains." - BALTIMORE CITY PAPER
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/doubledaggersucks

| FUTURE ISLANDS |
quirky four piece synth popsters from North Carolina and Baltimore. "Last night, Marty McSorley broadcast a live set from Baltimore's Future Islands. The set was filled with rhythmic keyboard pop that will worm its way into your ears instantly" - WFMU'S BEWARE THE BLOG
| MYSPACE / MP3s / VIDS |-- http://myspace.com/futureislands

| DJ DOG DICK |
Dj Dog Dick is Baltimoriole Max Eisenberg, sometimes Nautical Almanac collaborator, producing amazing, fúcked up beats and soemtimes rapping over them.
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/thedogdick

| WOODS |
Jeremy Earl, Steven Jarvis Taveniere, and G Lucas Crane (from Meneguar & Vanishing Voice among many other bands) and bassist Kevin Morby make strum heavy, atmospheric - yet anthemic - psychfolk pop (while deftly avoiding the well-worn clichés of that genre). Moody and catchy and understated, and oftens haunting - purveyors of some of the best songs being written in Bklyn today. If you need it spelled simply, think classic rock sounds plus shítgaze and noise, with songs that trancend genre.
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/woodsfamilyband

| BLANK DOGS |
emerging from a cloud of mystery, Blank Dogs is a brilliant bedroom recordings shit electronics project from Brooklyn, on In The Red records. In the past year, Blank Dogs have blown up seemingly with every music snob record collector and college kid in the world on the strength of collectible vinyl and internet downloads alone. Solid songs and great murky mixes, shít is rad and we're psyched to be putting this show on!
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/blankdogtime

| THESE ARE POWERS |
Anna Barie (x Knife Skills), Bil Salas, Pat Noecker (x Liars) tear it up in pounding, dark, sort of demented Silver Apples-sounding songs. These Are Powers are self-described purveyors of "Ghost-Punk," haunting crazed male and female vocals and reverb drenched guitar distortion over fractured bass and drum rumbles. Really, really good. Getting very dancey lately!
| MYSPACE / MP3s |-- http://myspace.com/thesearepowers

| USAISAMONSTER |
"The USAISAMONSTER is a brilliantly fried two-piece guitar and drums band of sun spotters hailing from Brooklyn, NY. The band has roved the planet with instruments strapped to their backs playing the tops of mountains, skin-melting deserts, and rusted out America." - Load Records Regarding their latest double LP Load says "Songs are as dense as malachite - complex like an infinite layered onion. Moods on this double LP go from quiet campfire drone to suntan lotion slippery cortex massagings of Pheonix all-star Meat Puppetry. Slather on as needed." - LoadRecords.com
| MP3s / MYSPACE |-- http://myspace.com/theusaisamonster
| LOAD PAGE |-- http://loadrecords.com/bands/usaisamonster.html

Okay so one thing that's admittedly cool here is these rare situations where you get to watch the blog machine do good for an up-and-coming band. Seriously. It's crazy. Hope there's more positive response in two weeks. There was a dude last night who took a flight from Richmond just to catch their show.

Things are okay. I'm working from the Gossip Girl coffee shop today. DIY Dan Deacon show on Friday. Hanging with Annie on Saturday. Laundry tonight. Ordered IKEA furniture. SXSW planning is coming along. I have five thousand business cards.

Gonna order running shoes and start training for marathon training, I think.

Five thousand is a lot.

Update: VIDEOS HERE.

I wanna see it nowwww.

I hope it has a heart attack.

Songs: Ohia's Magnolia Electric Co. has been in my top five favorite albums for over five years now holy moly.

matt jones: heard you got a new sweatshirt!
me: suck it!
matt jones: i cant wait to see it!
me: continue to suck it!
matt jones: gonna splooge on it!!!
me: ^name of new MJ single?

Me and Comedian Neighbor hopped on the E train at the same time today, and some dude asked us for change, and I said no. Comedian Neighbor gave him a dollar. The guy said he was trying to put together $300 for a ticket back to Vegas. I then gave him a dollar. Comedian Neighbor is super nice to everyone, vagabonds included, so he asked the guy if he'd heard of the punk venue he'd performed at there. The guy said he hadn't. Comedian Neighbor then asked what brought him to New York.

"My girlfriend."
"Oh really? That's nice!"
"That's why I need the money, man. I woke up this morning, and she was gone, and she'd stolen all my money."
"That's horrible!"
"Yeah. Sixteen thousand bucks, man. Just gone."
"Woah."
"I mean, I got more in a safe back in Vegas. No one has the combination for that but me, though. And you can't even trust your friends in Vegas. Everyone is trying to screw you. So yeah. I need three hundred bucks."

Comedian Neighbor got off at the next stop and left me holding the same bar as the dude. Later he txted: "Wow! An authentic drifter!"

I went to Times Square for lunch/to work on job stuff, and the Virgin Megastore didn't have any Hold Steady CDs. They had tons of semi-obscure stuff, but no Hold Steady. I was trying to buy The Hold Steady Almost Killed Me. No one in Brooklyn has it. That place creeped me out. The Wal-Mart of record stores. And come on. Biggest city in the nation: barely holding steady.

I took the 7 train back and there were two scruffy middle-aged guys sitting next to me. They were pouring over a book of basketball plays. Like, really analyzing each one. How they work. Setting a pick here opens up the lane for the point guard. I would do this one towards the end of the game if I were trying to draw a foul. I would do this one right after a timeout. I think I've seen a team run this one before. It works.

Speaking of which, I'm about to leave to catch the Knicks game with Annie. I have only a minor interest in non-Pistons professional basketball, and it is mostly related to bright lights and the possibiliity of being on television. I'm excited to see Annie though. She knows what things are like.

I met you at the blood bank.